The Day After

Don't worry, still pregnant.  In fact, there's no way I'm not pregnant, because I'm sick sick sick.  Barely survived my party yesterday - couldn't wait for everyone to leave so I could lie on the couch and watch The Sopranos.  

Oh, don't get me wrong, I'm thrilled, and I mean thrilled, that this worked out this time.  I'm not surprised so much, because I had all the same feelings I had in June and didn't have in April (even though as you can see I had talked myself out of believing it had worked towards the end there).  Saturday night I mentioned to a friend, "If I'm not pregnant right now, my body sure is doing a good job of faking me out!"  

I took a Dollar Tree test Saturday in the middle of the day just for kicks, and it was negative, but as I was bending over to put it in the trash I saw just a tiny little remnant of a line, only at a certain angle, and in a certain light.  At that point I pretty much knew, so Sunday morning (10 dpo)  I took a FRER (easier to read because the test window is so much bigger) and had a faint line there.  Almost immediately I felt nauseated, so I knew it wasn't my imagination!

For women who like to hear about symptoms (with the understanding that every woman, and every pregnancy, is different, and most of these things can be attributed to the progesterone suppositories), here is what I felt during the 2ww that made me believe this try had worked:

Night sweats, general elevated temperatures

Sore boobs, on and off

Cramping, bloating, heavy feeling in abdomen

Pulling sensation on right side of uterus, on and off* (this is the big one for me, since I never feel anything like this except when pregnant - the rest of the stuff is kind of PMS-y)

General aversion to food, or lack of interest in eating

Constipation/diarrhea, general out-of-sorts digestive troubles, not major

Here is what I will do differently this time:

I won't bother to test any more unless I lose my symptoms.  I won't go to Kaiser for a while.  I will keep taking the progesterone.  I will get aggressive about seeking out morning sickness remedies, because this shit is brutal (any suggestions welcomed!).  If I start to miscarry I will just let it happen and not go to the ER unless there's a compelling reason (like if I think I have an infection or something).  I will see if I can get into an OB or maybe see my RE for some early evaluation (the clinic won't see me after pregnancy for liability reasons, and Kaiser seems to be pretty obstinate about not doing any OB/GYN stuff until you're six weeks out, and even then it's not geared towards older women/women with issues who need extra help) - but none of this can happen until after my event anyway, so for now I'll just hang out and wait.

So, feeling this ill days before my event is a bit of a nightmare and is very concerning...kind of feeling like really bad timing again.  But I know what I think about it has no bearing on whether this one sticks or not - it either is or it ain't.  And in just one week the event will be all over and I can relax and evaluate my finances and focus on being pregnant (I hope).

Just for fun, here are some theories I am working out - again, any anecdotal evidence or thoughts on these would be welcomed!

Are women more fertile after miscarriage?

Do older women who have never been pregnant tend to "shut down" (ie, their ovaries, etc, sort of go to sleep) from lack of use, and then it takes a little medical kick in the butt to get the system started again?

Is the naturally released egg more likely to produce a viable pregnancy than the medically induced one?

Is there such a thing as a "starter pregnancy"?

Is earlier pregnancy detection/symptoms an indication of a "stronger pregnancy"?

Does artificial insemination cause more boy babies than girl babies because of the timing?

Is it possible for an ovulating woman to cause a close friend who is breastfeeding to start her period, just because of general proximity?  (a friend and I are testing this one out)

Once you have been pregnant, even if it's a loss, do you then go on to have your earlier fertility issues permanently resolved?  Temporarily resolved?