Ch-ch-ch-changes

So…I have a new car.  Spent all day yesterday unloading the old one, waiting around for paperwork, and picking up the new one.  But it was a day well spent, despite having to make lots of small talk with car dealers which for me is like nails on a chalk board (I mean, I’ll do it to be polite, but it’s not one of my favorite social activities…small talk with strangers, especially ones that exist only to extract money from you).  It’s funny with me and big purchases.  I always freak out at first (a mantra of “I can’t, I just can’t” echoing in my head) but then I spend a couple of days trying to figure out exactly how to pay for it, and eventually come up with some sort of satisfactory solution, which I did.  After all, this is no luxury – my car really wasn’t going to make it, and was not even remotely baby-friendly.  If it were just me I could have driven it into the ground and not cared if it left me stranded on the 710 at 2 AM.  But it’s not just me anymore.

This was my first thought when I finally got behind the wheel for the long drive home from the dealership.  “I’m going to have a baby in this car; there’s going to be a baby in this car,” and as usual with my default mode being denial, my first thought was, “no, there isn’t.”  But I kept glancing in the rearview mirror to the back seat.  Yes, there is going to be a car seat back there, and a cooing (or crying, or sleeping) baby.  And by the time he’s here the car will probably still have some vestiges of new car smell.  So despite fear about the payments, the down payment, the possible increase in insurance premiums, I knew I was being a responsible mama.  I always thought the day I turned over the fun single chick convertible for the boxy SUV would be a sad day.  And initially it kind of was – but only because it was raining and gloomy and on the way there the whole 110 was stopped because of a dead dog in the middle of the freeway, and of course I had to look, and of course it had a collar on so it was somebody’s pet, and I immediately had to go to my happy place to keep from crying, and had to remind myself that MY dog is alive and safe at home and nowhere near the 110.  And she’s sitting in her cat bed and licking her paws because they taste like Fritos (so I’m told).

So anyway, no sadness at the turnover of the symbol of my lifestyle, not really.  I mean, that’s where I was at in 2006, and now I’m here.  It’s all good.  If I’m really itching for a convertible again I’m sure I can get one when my kid is old enough to be in one safely. 

I typically buy a new car every seven years or so, and my favorite thing about getting a new car is all of the cool features that were once considered “extras” that by the time you buy new are considered “standard”.  Remember when having a CD player instead of cassette was a super big deal?  Ah, I remember those days.  This totally awesome car has integrated blue tooth (used it last night and was totally weirded out…I expected the car to start singing “Daisy” to me and telling me he’s not allowed to open the pod doors) which also allows me to listen to podcasts off my phone wirelessly (Marc Maron’s WTF is my current favorite – nothing I love more than comics interviewing other comics); and I took advantage of the in-steering wheel volume controls and cruise control. 

One interesting thing happened – because I sold my old car at CarMax and not at the dealer, when I got to the dealer they had not factored in my car sale as part of the down payment, which I had meant it to be.  I thought about correcting it – but then I realized the check I’d just gotten was almost the same amount I had spent on sperm just last week and was stressing about paying for.  I thought adding this in would only change the payment amount by maybe $20, $30?  Isn’t it worth it to have the vials just paid for now and not have to go into debt over it?  So I kept the check.  I love the idea that my swinging single chick car financed a possible future sibling for my future son.  There’s just a nice symmetry in that.

In physical news, I have been peeing like every five minutes.  The other night I got up about six times in the night.  I figure it’s practice for the baby, and luckily I don’t have to be anywhere in the morning so I don’t mind, but it does leave me waking up in the morning feeling pretty woozy and out of it. My body hasn’t changed much other than looking like I’m intentionally sticking out my stomach.  I wonder when I’ll have to start worrying about stretch marks…?  I am still able to comfortably wear my pre-pregnancy bras and underwear which is great because I hate shopping for bras.  Hair, nails, skin all the same; eating normally (other than the glut of grapefruit).  I know that one day all of this will change, but I guess for now I should revel in the fact that other than a slightly distended belly I still look and feel like “me”. 

The stuff has started arriving.  I bought a cute 50s rug with elephants on it, an elephant planter, a nursery container set, a bench with elephants on it…let’s see, what else…?  I am seriously considering buying some Banksy stencils off Etsy – he has one with an elephant, and other cool stuff like a little girl being pulled into the sky with balloons and a punk with angel wings.  I have this idea to hide them in corners of the room and see if my son can find them when he’s old enough.  “Where’s the Angel Punk?  Find mommy the Angel Punk!” could be a fun little game for us.