I’m not sure what it is. Most likely it’s just lack of exercise. I know well that feeling “off” makes you just want to lie around, and that lying around makes you depressed, and so the cycle goes. But I’m feeling very overwhelmed and just want to bury my head under the covers and not come out.
Mainly, I don’t feel well. I’ve now been back from Mexico for a week but have had diarrhea the entire week. It’s not scary, I-need-to-be-hospitalized-due-to-dehydration level, but it is I-wonder-if-I-should-see-a-doctor level. I’ve made sporadic attempts at fasting during this - today is another “fast day”, but honestly I feel so utterly lousy that I don’t know if I’ll make it. As a result I’ve put some weight back on (you’d think a week of diarrhea would at least help lose weight - nope), which means I’m pretty much starting over. Sigh.
I’m really scared for the future. My favorite candidate - Elizabeth Warren - is sliding in the polls and very unlikely to get the nomination, which I find utterly heartbreaking. Would I happily support Bernie? Of course. But I personally believe Warren would make a better president, and I’m just sick about it. Also, all of the Bernie Bros with their thinly veiled sexism in my FB feed are making me nuts.
AB5 - the California law basically outlawing my two businesses - still looms. Nobody knows what to do and everyone is terrified. Not to be dramatic but this *might* be the thing that utterly destroys me. If I ignore it - which I plan to - and get caught, we’re talking thousands, even millions, in penalties. It causes me tremendous stress every day.
Bobby has started pooping his pants again. I feel like this is never, ever going to end. I’m going to have a high school kid who still craps his pants every few weeks. I can’t stand it.
I have a massive tangle of taxes - extremely complicated this year - that I somehow have to unravel this week. The thought of it makes me, again, just want to hide my head under the covers.
There’s so much more - my still unresolved car accident, tons of looming home repairs, people not returning phone calls or emails with desperately needed information...etc etc. You know the feeling.
None of this is that terrible - all of it will be resolved. But I’m just exhausted and don’t feel well and I just want it all to go away.
Sorry things are tough right now. That's a lot to deal with. I think once you get the digestive issues resolved, everything else will seem more manageable - so good luck, and hope you're well again soon!
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