Covid scares

Not surprisingly I developed cold symptoms - sneezing, runny nose, congestion - on Tuesday. I took a home test - negative. I had a gig that night, and kept my mask glued to my face except when singing. Took another test Wednesday- negative. Went to sound check that night, again with the mask. Finally took a PCR test yesterday, and thank god it came back negative. At first I thought it was unlikely that this was covid since I felt fine, had no fever, etc, even though I know at this stage in the game, anything can be fucking covid, including feeling nothing at all, and home tests are pretty useless. But with the health of my fellow band mates at stake, as well as the 25 women coming to my bridal shower tomorrow, I had to know for sure. Apparently it’s possible to still catch a common head cold and not covid. Who knew?

It occurred to me today just how disastrous a covid infection in the family would be in the next two weeks - while people I’ve consulted about this have said, “just have the wedding anyway, wear masks, it’s outdoors, it’ll be fine,” I think it’s easy to say that. The reality is, if one or more of us had covid, I would have to painstakingly contact everyone on the guest list, and I guarantee you at least half if not more of the people would bow out just to be safe. Honestly, if it were me, and I didn’t really know what the place was going to be like, I wouldn’t put my family knowingly in harm’s way. I would just send a gift and bow out. So yes, we could go ahead with the wedding and actually get married - I wouldn’t cancel - but it could be a total disaster as far as nobody showing up and losing tons of money on food uneaten and tables not used, etc. All over a fucking virus. Now, I know countless couples have had it way worse than me over the last three years, having to cancel at the last minute, not getting deposits back, etc etc. Causing superspreaders and killing elderly relatives. I know it gets way worse than what our worst could potentially be. But still, ugh. I told the F today that after being a bit reckless at those concerts last weekend we have to be super cautious for the next two weeks. I’ve been given a new lease on life and I’m not going to screw it up. 

Things are looking really bad at the moment. LA county is back at medium transmission rates - we’re heading back to Labor Day-like numbers - masks are going back on, and everyone is scared. Part of me selfishly wishes we could just get this wave out of our system now and in the next couple of months so we can be at low transmission by September. But there’s no way of predicting where we’ll be by then. It could be low, or like this, or worse. My signups are lagging well behind last year. The event that normally sits against mine on Labor Day has announced they’re canceling for a third year in a row. God, I wish I could, too. The thing is, there will be no more forced closures - it’s on us, now, to make these decisions - and the hotel will never allow me to cancel just because I feel like it, and people will start just not coming back, if they haven’t already. But man do I wish I could get out of running the event this year. I have zero enthusiasm about it. I still don’t know how to handle a million scenarios that could happen re: vaccines and boosters and kids and medically compromised people and competitors and musicians and masks and testing. I have no fucking idea how to handle any of these issues. And I have very little guidance, so I just have to figure it out myself, which is unfair and overwhelming. As I told my sister just now, these days I mostly just disassociate in the In N Out parking lot. 

And yet, I’ve managed to lose nine pounds in the last month since I started this “simple diet” - 1400 calories/day. I can’t argue with the results, not one bit. Suddenly I’m fitting into things and liking myself in the mirror a lot more. I hadn’t lost a pound since February of 2020, so it’s great to see that scale head down again after all this time. Now I’m just one pound away from a healthy weight, and six pounds away from an awesome weight in which I’d be able to wear anything in my closet. That’s my goal - six more pounds. Don’t know if I’ll actually keep going, but right now I’m pretty happy with the results. 

Here is Theo with his volcano project largely created by me (as you do).