What got me going was another unpleasant playground experience yesterday. There was a sand pit and an older, meaner kid was playing with his own toys, and of course little sweet innocent Bumpus goes over and wants to play, too. I knew something bad was going to happen - the kid kept pushing B away and yelling "no!" at him, so I immediately swooped in and whisked B off to something else he could do. So far that's how I've handled these mean bigger kids - just get my kid away from them, pronto. I'm not about to start lecturing someone else's kid or let my poor little baby be treated like crap. So I posted on Facebook how bummed I am about how mean bigger kids are to littler kids on playgrounds, and a bunch of mothers offered suggestions on how to handle it (most of them have 3-4 year olds, however), and then one woman totally pissed me off by saying removing B from the situation is preventing him from learning conflict resolution and that life isn't always fair. Huh? Maybe she thought I was talking about an older kid, but I thought that was the stupidest thing I'd ever heard - and I wrote back the idea of letting my *barely* toddler be mistreated by some much bigger, much older kid, and just doing nothing, is idiotic. Someone liked her comment - an older woman with no kids. Really?
Then later I checked on a WTE post I had written in the LA moms group about finding a doctor to order the Mat21 test for me since Kaiser won't - and only one person responded, saying she didn't meet the criteria for the test either and I can't force someone to order it for me. I wrote back that I do actually meet the criteria, I just need someone to order it for me who isn't contractually obligated to some other company - but thanks so much for your helpful response. Bitch.
So, that and tons of paperwork has pretty much been my day. My inbox is full of people wanting discounted hotel rooms even though the rate expired on Friday, people wanting refunds even though the refund date expired July 30, and people performing on Teams Saturday night who want their whole family to come watch them but none of them want to pay to get in.
Two more weeks of this bullshit and then I'm FREE. I can't WAIT.
Here's a happier picture of B at the playground:
I think I'll save the conflict resolution lessons for when Elena is, oh say, 4 or 5!!! I do the same as you! On the flipside though, I am always making sure Elena is sharing & being kind as I don't want her to be THAT kid on the play ground!
ReplyDeleteThere is point at which people need to learn conflict resolution without an adult swooping in to intervene and that point is, I don't know law school? Even adults get mediators. Seriously!
ReplyDeleteYes, to an extent a 6,7 or 8 year old should learn to handle his or herself with her peer- but even then, they need to know that sometimes it's best to get an adult involved.
You handled the situation just fine. And Bumpus would NOT have been any better off if you'd let the kid who was likely at least TWICE his age pick on him.
can I just say i love your blog? you rock. I love that you can just say it like it is.
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