My former nemesis texted me today that she found out she is having a boy. She did a very early amino since some of her NT results came back not great (but she said the results that were off could have been because this is an IVF baby). It's funny, she had mentioned she had gotten not great NT results at our brunch but didn't say much else - then today in her texts she said she almost went out of her mind with worry. I wanted to ask why she didn't reach out - but then was reminded how much I hate it when you're having a problem and someone gets mad at you for not asking for help, etc, rather than just offering sympathy and comfort. After all when I was TTC and had all kinds of frustrating things happen I didn't tell her, either. So there you go.
I am happy she's having a boy since she has almost my exact due date, meaning her boy and mine will be only a year apart. My Mom Guru friend thinks she's having a boy, too, also early next year. It's so cool to think of all these little boys running around growing up together.
Which brings me to the topic of...who the hell's life is this? Sons growing up together? Halloween parades? Play dates? Getting to know friends I've already shared an adult life with all over again, in a whole new way? I so often catch myself in the mirror holding Bumpus and wonder who's cute kid I'm babysitting. This can't all be real, right?
Is it just because I waited so long and had so much disappointment that I feel this way, or do all happy mothers feel this way - that this level of joy and satisfaction with your kids is something only other people get to experience?
And we're even sick, and things haven't been so great for me emotionally lately, yet I still feel really good about The Bumpus.
Honestly I just can't kiss and hug him enough. Sometimes I think I'll squeeze him so tight a substance resembling guacamole will come out of his ears.
You're in a new stage of your life. It does seem lucky to me that so many other people in your life seem to be in this stage also. Give Bumpus a big squeeze for me also. He is a cutie!
ReplyDeleteI have the same feeling of "who's life is this" and "how did I get here" all the time. It's still just SO surreal. I can't help wonder if the surreality (is that a word) feeling ever goes away, or if it just keeps feeling like I'm living someone else's life forever... And I also think I might someday squeeze my little one too hard! I get tears in my eyes sometimes when I think about how very much I absolutely love her! Bumpus is adorable - keep up the great work!
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