Yes, he is his mother’s son.
That same night, dad was working late and I was watching a documentary on Netflix about the remarkable gay rights activist Peter Tatchell. Bobby as usual came out of his room and crawled into bed with me in an effort to stave off bedtime. Normally I would send him right back, but he seemed quite interested in the documentary and I thought this would be a good time to have some important discussions. He watched for quite a while in silence, and at a certain point I asked him if he understood anything that was going on. He said not really, so I explained. I was shocked he forgot what gay meant - at this moment our neighbors on all three sides are gay and they have lots of friends with gay parents - but he remembered right away when I explained; I also took the opportunity to explain human rights, free speech, prejudice and religious bias, as all these things featured in the movie. He couldn’t believe in Russia you can’t speak out against the president. It’s sweet and sad to know that kids his age have no idea what a shit world this can be. I also took the opportunity to explain what a hero Tatchell is, how relentless and brave, and how his childhood of being bullied by a cruel stepfather caused him to want to spend his life standing up for oppressed people. I’m in awe of this person. Especially after seeing him make peace with his very religious, sweet mother - something I was never able to do with my mother who was also a basically good person trapped in her ideology - it was very poignant for me. I hope Bobby learned a few things. He seems to get it - he’s a very empathetic, thoughtful kid. I hope these moments have an impact on him.
We had a long talk with both kids on 9/11 and I could tell the things we told them about our personal experiences - how it was one of the worst days of our lives, how traumatized we all were, how it changed our lives forever - was surprising to them. I think they thought of it as some distant historical event (how could they not?) that doesn’t really have any relevance today. Hopefully we disabused them of this.
For now, life around here is surprisingly…good. Now that the stress of my event is behind me, I have my sense of calm and well being back. Having the house to myself during the day is magical, and I’m getting a lot of long delayed projects done, which feels good. I’m giddy about the upcoming wedding (sent our Save the Dates last week, so it’s officially “on”), and am starting to plan some other road trips for us. We’ve had a couple of concerts cancel - Gary Numan, Adam Ant - but also have a couple coming up that hopefully will actually happen; The Rolling Stones, X. The supplemental grant I’ve been waiting a few weeks for *might* start being disbursed by the middle of next week. There’s no guarantee I’ll actually get it - but it’s fairly likely. Then in just three more weeks the local version of that grant becomes available, so more opportunity there. I’ve also now made $300 off my Etsy store. I will spend this entire week hustling to get more listings up. I have a huge rack of clothes just waiting to be sold. Can’t wait to send them off to their new homes.
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