Sunday, February 9, 2014

Reconciling

Over the last few days, I have decided to reconcile myself to two things. 

One is that despite being healthy and just about a month shy of my due date, that I should expect to have the medical world more, not less, up in my business now. I don't know why I thought that I would just sail through at this point - this is (often) where things "start happening", so I need to be prepared that at each of my appointments from now on they're going to want to test things, check things, prescribe things, etc. It's annoying but I can handle it if I go in expecting it. 

The other thing I am bracing for is B's possible negative reaction to the baby, either now or in the future. Just like I handle his hitting/kicking a lot better when I remind myself that he's doing it thinking we're playing, I have to remember if he acts out after the baby comes that a) it's normal and b) it will pass, also deserves understanding, not punishment. I'm not sure how that will play out exactly - but again I think it's important to be realistic and ready to handle anything that may come up.

Tonight I finally got off my butt and put together my hospital bag and put out a spare key and keys to the car. In my hospital bag I put:

Dark sweatpants
Dark underwear
Pumping bra
Nursing bras
Nipple shields
Silicone nipple protectors
Phone charger
Basic toiletries
Baby clothes - caps, socks, onesies, pants

I also updated my emergency pick up list at the Baby Kennel. When I went to L&D last weekend I realized with horror that all of the people on the list were out of town, so if I was kept overnight I'd be completely screwed as far as someone being authorized to pick him up for me. So I took off my ex-friend (!), and added my baby sitter and various people I know who have offered to help and happen to have car seats. 

I also had my final visit with the doula today. It's too weird to think that the next time I see her I will most likely be in labor. The visit consisted almost entirely of watching birth videos - which normally would make me sick to my stomach, but I think I've gotten over a lot of that now, and I promised myself to have an open mind. They were actually pretty interesting - especially the one of a family having an unassisted home birth of twins(!). Have you ever seen a second twin's foot sticking out of his mother's hoo-hah? Well, now I have!

I did my maternity shoot this Saturday. B was super cranky and clingy and was not  having it. Thankfully this photographer has three small children and so completely got it - and we got some really lovely shots, which I'll download tomorrow. Here is a preview:


2 comments:

  1. Don't forget the infant car seat! And if you have one, I found a breastfeeding pillow extremely helpful in the hospital when my abs were all shot to sh*t.

    I think it's great that you have this new attitude of, um, resignation? You are right that both are very likely to happen, and both for the purpose of proving you with positive outcomes -- a healthy baby, a happy family. I, unfortunately, don't think there's a way around either. but it will be so worth it!

    and look what you've accomplished! you're relaxed and chill with B... and you're healthy! both of these will help so much with the challenges.

    rock on!

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  2. I held a baby the other day, and when Jordyn saw, she immediately signed "all finished". Ha! Good thing I don't have another one coming so fast! Nut yeah, at least you won't be surprised if B does have a bad reaction to the baby initially. But, hell get over it, and end up loving him, with time.

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