In the end it felt better when I changed position (I find sitting in my glider extremely uncomfortable now, and almost impossible to get up from), and was so tired by 11 PM I told myself to just go to sleep because there was nothing to be done about it now anyway.
And of course today I'm fine. But I have to admit last night I was freaked out. After all my harping on about wanting to experience spontaneous labor, I now wonder if I have the stomach for it! Be careful what you wish for, huh? The uncertainty is killing me. Now when people ask how much longer, as a man did in the supermarket today, I can honestly say "oh, any day now!"
The thing that bugs me the most is possible false alarms - like last night - if it gets to the point of getting all set up with my doula ready to meet me, the sitter on her way from San Diego, my sister on a plane, some friend inconvenienced in the middle of the night to come sit with B, and me in Labor & Delivery being told, "yeah, go home. You're not in labor, you just have indigestion." Although the odds are this is a lot less likely with a second baby, it's still a possibility. Now that would suck. But I have zero experience with "real" labor so it may be a bit touchy. Unless my water breaks I really may not know what's happening. You cramp and hurt and feel weird all the time at this point. When is it for real?
Part of my problem is I've cleared most of my activities in anticipation of possible labor...which has left me bored, lonely, and obsessing. I am thinking I might load up my schedule even if I have to cancel everything just so I can keep busy and keep my mind off things. Of course it's set to start raining here tonight for several days, which in LA means don't leave the house because the roads are so dangerous. What the heck am I going to do cooped up with an active two-year-old for five days??? I'd better start making some plans pronto!
Here is a pic taken of B at the baby kennel last weekend for "Hispanic Awareness Day" - of the least Hispanic kid in the place, ha ha!