Budapest

Returned from my second and possibly last trip to Budapest. For the next three years the event will fall on Halloween; I had spent countless hours of mental energy trying to figure out how to make this work - maybe miss one Halloween but then have the band use another singer for the other two, try to shift the nights we play off the weekend, try to at least be home for the kids’ school parade if not actual trick or treating, etc - but then our drummer bailed me out by emailing that he’d have to give next year a pass to stay home for his kid. Thank you, loyal family guy. 

I had (and still have) a horrific guttural cough the whole trip, which made singing three nights in a row pure torture. Lots of water, tea and cough drops helped somewhat, but I mostly survived by convincing myself not to cough while singing, which was very difficult and mentally draining. Still, the trip was enjoyable. I love the city, and enjoyed a good parboil at one of the local thermal baths. I’m sad we’ll miss it for several years (possibly forever, if they forget about us), but hey - we got a good offer for Spain the weekend after for next year, so there’s that.

Miracle of miracles, both boys have been dry the last three nights. Somehow Bobby just stopped peeing after weeks of wet pjs. I don’t trust it - Theo’s been out of pull-ups since the summer but still seems to wet the bed once or twice a week, but we’re clearly making progress. I’ve been all over the map with this night training stuff - having been told it’s a mind-body connection and they’ll do it when they’re ready, but then coming to realize they’ll never do it as long as they have the convenience of a pull up to pee in and finally just having to force the issue at 7 1/2 and 5 1/2, I can honestly say I wish we’d done this way sooner. Of course the reason I didn’t was because of B’s horrendous encopresis, which, by the way, has not been an issue since he learned to squat on the toilet seat back in July. So, hallelujah there. 

I’ve been interested in this theory called the four tendencies about personality types. While I take all of these things with a huge grain of salt, I have to admit I’ve always known I’m a rebel type - I have to do things my own way and on my own, I’ll reject things others like or want me to like just because, I enjoy being a contrarian just to shock or annoy people. I’m not saying any of this is something to be proud of; I’m just saying it is. And I definitely see these qualities in Bobby, which makes me equal parts smugly proud and scared. I’m convinced his issues with toilet stuff - the encopresis and delayed night training - are a big part of this. He wants control over his body and he’ll do things on his own time no matter what you want. It’s frustrating as a parent, but I get it, as it is me. Why he’s decided now that it’s time to be dry at night, I don’t know. But I’m not going to look that gift horse in the mouth. If it’s finally time to stop buying expensive pull-ups at the grocery store and wipes and keeping the diaper genie, I’m utterly delighted.