For the country that should be, not the one that is

Thank goodness a like minded friend invited us to a low key BBQ on the 4th with the intention of providing a refuge for those of us who didn’t feel like celebrating. I definitely didn’t feel like going to our usual high school fireworks show, not after the bill of course passed after the entire GOP caved (much to my endless revulsion, turns out some of these holdouts were only holding out to force a meet and greet with Trump for some free merch - kill me now). 

So we made the long drive up to Lompoc, picking up a friend on the way, and it was exactly what we all needed. We stuffed our faces and talked for hours about our fears. My host had just gotten her kids their first passports and was looking into dual citizenship with Mexico. Funnily enough, late the night before I had emailed a Brazilian law firm that specializes in dual citizenship to see what it would entail. This is something I’ve considered for years but never taken any steps towards. The short answer from the lawyer is yes, my birth certificate showing my father as born in Brazil would be enough, and it would cost $1500. I can, of course, do it myself through a consulate and not pay a lawyer fee. But I do have to ask myself what the purpose of it is, and if it’s worth doing. Brazilian citizenship comes with certain obligations - I would have to vote in their elections, and they do have compulsory military service for young men (if, say, we fled to Brazil as a family and I got citizenship for the boys). Since it’s not just me as an individual but me and a husband and two children, the idea of being able to “flee” quickly is kind of moot - leaving them behind isn’t an option. And to have a passport I believe requires fluency in Portuguese. So, it’s complicated. It’s nice to have a fantasy escape plan, but I don’t think this is a practical plan. Brazil wouldn’t be my escape country of choice - anywhere in Europe would make way more sense. And if it’s about possibly retiring to somewhere, like France, as a kinder, gentler place to live my golden years, I can do that without being a citizen. 

So the kids had fun with the illegal fireworks (our running joke all night was “what laws? We’re not a country of laws anymore!!”), we made the almost three hour drive home safely, and I’ve just been puttering around doing errands and working on my event all weekend. My sister comes in for a week tomorrow night and the boys start their local rec center camp tomorrow. After a few days of sleeping in, from now on every day is accounted for until school resumes in six weeks. 

I have to say, the “feral summer” days haven’t been too bad. The kids entertain themselves (with screens…) and I can pretty much go about my days as I usually would, since they can be left alone for hours now. I would definitely not want to spend more than a few days at a stretch like this in future summers, but it’s good to know it’s an option. Gone are the days of having to have activities and supervision for the kids every second of every day. This current iteration is parenting I can get behind.