Getting in the groove

I re-joined the Y last week. I hadn’t been there since a short time before the pandemic shut everything down - I closed my account because I hadn’t been using it enough; little did I know what was coming in just weeks (I feel like every February/early March for a while is going to be full of triggering “little did we know what was about to happen” vibes). Back in the day it had been a perfect place for me and my preschooler (Theo) - free child care for an hour while I worked out. But once both kids were in school it became a needless expense. 

However, years later, things have changed. I desperately need to get active and start building muscle at my age. Also doing the podcast about my former culty religion reminded me how easy it is for me to get disconnected from my body, and I want to change that. I heard once an older lady say that exercise is one thing she never compromises on - that it always takes priority over everything else. I do want to be a healthy older person, who’s strong and capable. So after discovering that my home Y never has any availability in their classes or pool, I decided to look into the newly renovated Hollywood Y. I went there on Tuesday for a yoga class that went well, and did strength training today, which also went well. Unsurprisingly most of the people in the classes were elderly women, so that’s right about my speed.

It’s funny, building new habits. The long drive, the parking, the gym bag, the classroom etiquette - these are all things I way over analyze and stress out about. It’s hard to look at this gym and accept that it has to become your second home; this is a huge new thing in your life. You’re going to spend a lot of time here. Today since I had to kill some time, I brought a full gym bag and showered and enjoyed the sauna for a few minutes. At some point I may look into swimming some laps. On the way home I bought extra toiletries and flip flops and other random things so I don’t have to keep packing and unpacking. I plan to take classes there 2-3 times a week and walk the other days. 

I have no illusions that this will magically make me skinny. I know it won’t. But right now I’m just focusing on building a new habit and re-acquainting myself with my body, building muscle, getting stronger. That’s step one. The weight stuff, the food stuff, I’ll tackle later - preferably once the March gauntlet of three family birthdays and a week in an RV for spring break are behind me. 

I did my taxes yesterday, with good results. I didn’t owe much more than I’d pre-paid, and my accountant gave me a good strategy for a tax shelter that will also double as saving for kids’ college, something I’ve been fretting over for some time. I also got a better picture of what this event actually costs to run (I was shockingly accurate, it turns out). With taxes behind me, I can officially put 2023 to bed. 

2023, honestly, kinda sucked. Remembering the massive amount of stress I had this time last year - our wish to bury our elderly friend with some dignity having gone horribly wrong, the hotel stonewalling me and causing me to do countless hours of research in case I had to move (all fruitless), our desert cabin unfinished and in limbo, my credit card company withholding funds, losing customers over unavailable hotel rooms, slow signups leading me to believe I needed to prepare to be broke again…just too much. Already this year is off to a much better start. Very grateful for that. 

Desert visit

We had an idyllic visit to the desert last weekend. It’s funny how one small change - the overhang, plus the hanging chair hammocks I bought three years ago - can be so magical. Suddenly the place is becoming as I’d pictured it in spring of 2021.

It’s still a little chilly at night, but daytimes are t shirt weather, even in February. And we haven’t had to use the heater at all, which says to me the average winter visit out there will easily be survived without using the heater or wood burning stove. Next we still need to figure out our water situation. That’ll be the spring project, that hopefully won’t cost anything. 

The boys loved swinging in the chair hammocks, which made me happy. Anything to get these kids off screens, right?

Speaking of screens, because Bobby is taking a game design class after school starting this Thursday, I had to buy him a laptop, something I had hoped to put off a little longer. But the fact is, he’s turning twelve in a month, he’s starting seventh grade in the summer, and he’s gotten really into making music on his iPad, which has its limits. So tonight we’ll give him his early birthday present and I’m sure he’ll be delighted, since he’s been campaigning hard for it for several months. I installed some parental software on it that will hopefully block the gnarlier adult content. Of course he wants a phone, too, but I’m putting that off as long as I can.

Now we’re scrambling to think of something equally awesome for Theo’s tenth birthday in three weeks. He has no ideas for us, and we have no ideas for him. He’s always so hard to buy for. Here’s hoping I come up with something good. 

Independent kids

Bobby is on day two of his Catalina 6th grade trip, and tonight Theo’s 4th grade class is going to see The Wiz and won’t be home until 11 pm or so. I’ll be alone in the house on a weeknight, which pretty much never happens. Maybe I should sneak out and have dinner with a friend or something.

I survived the band trip to Munich, and it was pretty much what I expected. Since we hadn’t been in Europe since 2019, people were really excited to see us (many had never seen us and only knew us from our two decades of CD releases), so there was a certain rock star vibe about the gig, while at the same time the three day festival was also a massive pain in the ass. While everything went smoothly, it was very physically demanding - we alternated stages with many other bands, so there was a ton of packing up and moving over and over again in one night, plus a lot of waiting around, and the venues were often a long walk from our hotel on crowded, construction-filled sidewalks. I was in charge of the band’s suitcase full of 50 lbs of charts, which meant lots of hauling this suitcase over cobblestone streets in the cold while also in a vintage dress and questionable shoes, then struggling through packed, sweaty crowds up and down stairs and through extremely heavy doors to get to the next stage. The last two nights were also extremely late, ending Sunday night at about 4 AM and then having to get up at 8 AM for our flight (and having to find our way to the airport using public transport, so again, hauling giant heavy suitcases up and down stairs, down uneven streets with tons of pedestrians and bicycles, etc etc). Anyway, suffice it to say it was exhausting and I’m extremely glad it’s over. I knew it was going to be like that, hence my creeping dread in the weeks leading up to it. Thankfully everything went well here - Bobby made it to his trip take off on time, kids got to and from school each day, and the H didn’t leave the house a mess for me when I got home. Our next big band trip isn’t until July when things won’t be anywhere near as complicated as far as kids doing school stuff. So that’s a relief.

Now I focus on final tax calculations before my appointment in two weeks, cleaning up the mess left after my Feb 1st contest registration opening, and trying to get more participants for my podcast (I’m officially out of interviewees). 

My contest registration went well except that the system did not honor pre-set limits on registrations for some reason - thankfully I was monitoring it and shut each contest down when I saw they were selling over the limits; but the damage is done. I currently have 17 showcase routines when we only have time for 12, and several other contests have similar issues. I know with people dropping out we should be fine by the time the event rolls around, but it gives me no wiggle room to let in scholarship folks or volunteers or anyone else who doesn’t sign up using normal channels. I’ve addressed the issue of the system failure with the registration company but as of yet have heard nothing. I’m considering switching companies next year because their customer service is pretty non-existent. 

After seeing how quickly the contests sold out (some in just minutes - we’re back to pre-pandemic levels on that, finally), and facing a couple of other dilemmas such as not having time for the now very important cultural panels, I’m considering a radical step, which is adding a day to the event moving forward. Right now we start on Friday night; I’d like to start Thursday night instead. I crunched some numbers and although it will cost more, it isn’t prohibitively expensive. While I personally loathe the idea of being there an extra night and day, I also think taking the pressure off our current over-packed schedule would make the time I am there less stressful. It will also allow me to have ample time for the cultural presentations, decent meal breaks, and allow me to add in a few contests that will help allow more participation (we desperately need intermediate level contests, not just Am and Advanced). I don’t intend to raise prices, so I would hope despite the inconvenience of having to stay an extra night at the hotel and take another day off work that people will be into it. The only people I haven’t consulted are the hotel, so it’s not confirmed yet. But I’m hoping I can implement this for 2025. It’s going to be a big change - it’s probably been more than 20 years since I added a day to this event. I guess needing to expand isn’t a bad thing, right? A year ago I thought I’d have to cut everything back! Just goes to show how unpredictable this industry is. 

Here’s a picture of our desert place with the front overhang that was installed while I was away.