My agenda: take Bumpus to my sloping front yard for the first time in the hopes that he will play nicely with the large selection of trucks and toys I brought out for him, while I sit on my butt and play with my phone.
Bumpus' agenda:
Teeter precariously at the top of the slanted cement stairs, throw handfuls of dirt and landscaping bark down said stairs, try to crawl into the poorly secured crawl space, pick up handfuls of (no doubt) toxoplasmosis-tainted stray cat shit and hand it to me, and repeatedly attempt to pull out the dirty, muddy yard hose, covering both of us with mud. Ignore toys entirely.
My agenda:
Go to playground. Run and play.
Bumpus' agenda:
Plunk down next to small girl playing in the sand, grab her toys and unintentionally fling sand in her face, to the horror of her parent/nanny. Insinuate self into groups of older boys who push him away making me come over and intervene before someone gets hurt. Run up to homeless people and flirt with them, roping me into many uncomfortable conversations.
My agenda:
Play nicely with your toys until I'm ready to get up in the morning.
Bumpus' agenda:
Go into mommy's room at six AM and pull down all the curtains/curtain rods, shove things into the diaper pail, dump all of the contents of all of the drawers on the floor, and climb all over mommy. Ignore nice box of toys entirely.
My agenda:
Bumpus wears his own shoes.
Bumpus' agenda:
Bumpus wears my shoes. Exhibit A:
Ugh! Hang in there.
ReplyDeleteI am so grateful that my mom is having a blast doing most of the mothering of my duo right now. (This is actually being typed from a motel room in another state.)
It's hard running after a child! It's a lot of work! I have been there and am still there. There WILL come a time when you can sit in the sun and relax while he plays-either at the park or in your yard. There is light at the end of the tunnel. Can you wall off or get rid of the bad cat area/stuff? Can you wall off the unsafe area and go to a park that blocks off homeless people and has a play area that enclosed for the kids? I wish I could say something to make you feel better. I get it, I really do. I have just now been able to sit at the park a bit while my child plays and she turned 3 a few months ago. Hugs.
ReplyDeleteThey do have completely different agendas than us. It's no sense trying to get them to do things our way--they inherited their stubbornness from us!
ReplyDeleteAt least he totally ROCKS that pair of silver heels!
ReplyDeleteUgh. It's hard. Really, really hard. At least with the next toddler, you won't be pregnant.
It does get easier. Slowly, incrementally, easier.
You put it so well! Exactly what life with a toddler is like! Love the silver shoes - Rock on Bumpus!
ReplyDeleteI'm sorry that I found this hilarious! What a character! I always find it so frustrating that in a room full of toys, Elena would only be interested in what she wasn't allowed to touch!
ReplyDelete