Thursday, May 29, 2014

The best of me

Today was a really good day. For whatever reason, Bumpus was just super agreeable to everything, or if he wasn't, he just shook his head rather than screaming. He even stopped screaming in the car when I explained to him that yes, I don't like it when the baby cries in the car, either, but he's just a baby and he doesn't know better. I have been talking to him like a big boy lately and explaining things a lot more - is this what happens when children feel listened to? Or did we just have a fluke of a good day? Either way, thank you, universe, I needed that!

He absolutely gets that he has to be seated before he gets to eat. He's still pretty picky and seems to eat hardly anything, but he might just be in one of those light eating phases. This experience has taught me that, as I suspected, children really do thrive on rules and structure. At least, for now -

So many people have told me how much worse three is than two-years-old that I am quaking in my boots. Right now B's opposition is annoying but not constant - for the most part he just kind of does what I ask, from getting his milk into the fridge or brushing his teeth or picking out some pajamas. What on earth would I do if he just plain defied me - refused to leave the house, refused to let me change his clothes and diaper for bed...what would I do if he got to the place where he would just scream and throw fits over everything, all the time? Not that every three year old does, of course - but I've seen some pretty gnarly three year old behavior out there. God help me.

Well, hopefully by then, a) we'll be in the rhythm of preschool so I will get regular breaks, which I don't get now, and b) the presence of a younger brother he can interact with will be a positive thing.

I've been thinking a lot about B's second year - all that time between ages one and two - and how compromised I was due to pregnancy. I mean, from ages 15 months to two years I was pregnant and mentally and physically not all there for him. It's weird to think Theo won't have that at that age - I won't be all his, either, but I will not be physically or hormonally challenged by pregnancy. So as much as Theo is missing out a bit on his babyhood because I have to devote so much attention to older brother right now, we can catch up later when B is in school and it's just me & T. It's weird to think about that. 

1 comment:

  1. Two was tough but three has definitely been much worse. Outright defiance for sure. But you're absolutely right that children need rules & structure. Elena is FINALLY getting that it but is always testing the limits so I'm always very clear & number one rule is I do not ever ever ever give in to screaming & crying no matter how much I want to or how much easier it would be. I just didn't want her to ever believe that was acceptable behavior. The challenge is my mom gives in all the time which makes it tougher on me...but she's getting it.