Epic southwest trip, pt II

The next day we spent the day at Monument Valley. We had driven by the area on our last trip two years ago, and I had earmarked it for more of a deep dive later. This time we paid for a Navajo guided tour, and as soon as we started down the rough road, I was so glad we did - our van never would have made it.

What can I say about Monument Valley? Just stunning and beautiful and other worldly. We were all just in awe the entire day.

I had canceled our final stay because they told me they had no toilets, and had already re-configured our final days for us to drive home on Sunday as opposed to Monday, since staying on our cabin property Sunday night as a halfway point would have been impossible due to the heat. I found us another RV spot on hipcamp for our last night Saturday night. On our way we stopped at the Lava River Cave which was way longer and gnarlier than I ever would have anticipated. Despite bringing sneakers, warm clothes, and headlamps for everyone, it all went wrong - the headlamps were all dead, and the batteries I’d brought just in case were the wrong ones (why is anything AAA battery-run, honestly? Like, wtf). The H and I had our phones, I had brought a backup flashlight, and there was one more headlamp that was just a black light, so we headed out anyway. On our way down a kind traveler gave me her headlamp, which was amazing, because there was no way I would have made it with a phone in hand for how much climbing and scrambling there ended up being. The H and I had very thin-soled sneakers that were torture on the sharp, pointy rocks, and poor Bobby had to pee and ended up wetting himself before we could find our way out. It just went on and on. So it started off sort of fun and adventurous but ended with us all being exhausted, somewhat in pain, and, for one of us, covered in pee. Good times.

But the good times weren’t over. The owner of that night’s stay property sent us a pin that, after a frighteningly rough and miserable half hour on rocky dirt roads with big pockets of soft sand we barely got through, led us to an abandoned shack that was clearly not it. We went to a house nearby that we thought had to be the right place - but the suspicious owner (who I’m pretty convinced can’t account for his whereabouts on 1/6/21) said he had never heard of this person who owned the land we were looking for and that camping around there was illegal. We (of course) had no service so had to painstakingly make our way back to the highway, another wretched half hour being bounced and rattled and having all the cabinets fly open and throw our items all over the van. When we got on the 40 - by this time I’d found us a restaurant in Seligman since we were all starving and there was no way in hell I was cooking after all that - I tried the owner again and he said he’d come out and meet us, and to drop a pin of our location, but I said forget it, we weren’t heading back up there. Thankfully we made it to the charming roadside pizza place before it closed and I got us a spot at the pleasant KOA nearby so we had a safe place for our final night - with showers!

We went to some tourist spots in Seligman in the morning and then headed out.

Sunday we drove six hours home and then spent what seemed like 24 full hours cleaning out the van and getting the house put back in order. Since we returned the van to a leasing office and not the owner, I’m waiting with bated breath to see what extra charges we get stuck with. I have a lot of anxiety around this.

Overall I think I can say the trip was pretty great - and the constant problem solving and having to be flexible, while exhausting, was a good introduction to what this last month before my event will be like. Would I do things differently next time? I would say yes, but then, I don’t know - the ideal would be to have a place with a kitchen that you can use as a central point to do other things - but you get to see so much more when you can drive around. And being self-contained is great…except when you can’t really use the shower or toilet and there’s no AC and every night after activities all day you’re too exhausted to cook and just have to go out for expensive dinners anyway. Would we have been better off in an RV? It’s hard to say. I liked the agility of the van and being able to park anywhere, and RVs don’t feel less cramped to me, not really. And every one we’ve rented has been in various phases of disrepair. And none of them are cheap. With all the added fees they end up being $2,000 and up for a week, which is about the same as a fancy hotel, plus gas. I do want to go back to that area - still so much to do - but I just don’t know how to do it cheaply and effectively. Tent camping isn’t practical when you’re always on the move. Hmmm. It’s a puzzle to figure out. 

I enjoyed the family time, despite Bobby driving us nuts playing the Angry Birds theme on his plastic recorder every five seconds until we had to hide it when he wasn’t looking, and Theo drinking water every five seconds and consequently having to pee every five seconds. We had some rousing games of Uno, something we haven’t done in ages, and I got a kick out of the few breakfasts and lunches I was able to make in the tiny space. I also survived yet another weird perimenopausal period that started just as we left and only a couple of weeks after the last one ended. I guess that’s my life now - a period every two weeks. Thanks, I hate it. 

For now, I’m going to focus back on my event, preparing the kids for school in two weeks (I’ve heard nothing yet from the new school which makes me wonder if they’re even going there), and plotting our next big adventure, whenever that may be. 

Epic southwest trip

We have returned from our week long campervan adventure across Arizona. As always, I’m a little surprised that a) we’re all alive, b) the cat is alive, and c) the house wasn’t broken into. My catastrophizing brain can never quite accept that things going horribly wrong is not the norm. But I digress.

Overall impression? Despite a few minor hiccups, I mostly enjoyed it, and towards the end started to get little pangs of sadness that it would soon be over. I came to a realization about why I love camping trips - other than the obvious getting out into nature, etc. I think as a woman that a house can be a real burden - so many things to clean, organize, and manage, especially when you have a kid or kids. It’s a huge mental load. Reducing all of the managing to a small number of possessions somehow lessens that load. I know this will probably be obvious to everyone but me, but I found it revelatory. And it reminds me of why, when I picture myself old and alone and living in my desert cabin, I always picture it very simple - a stove, a washbasin. That’s it. I don’t wish to try to make a modern life out there. But anyway.

We picked up the van on Monday and drove to our first night spot - the only actual boondocking spot I had selected. We got there at night in the dark, and it was completely deserted and also peaceful and beautiful. And hot as hell. At ten o’clock at night it was still 105°. Great, let’s get the AC going. We couldn’t figure it out, so contacted the van owner, who told us that no, there is in fact no AC despite my having selected this van and our entire itinerary based on having AC. Apparently the only AC was from the dashboard and only when the van was actually running. What the hell. I’m still really annoyed by that - why TF list your campervan as having AC when it actually doesn’t?? Anyway, this led to a miserable and panicked hour or so as we both called every hotel in the area to find a room, only to hear over and over that every hotel was fully booked. Except, finally, the last *smoking* room in a Days Inn in Kingman. We high tailed it over there, and it was just as run down and awful as a hotel that still has smoking rooms would be - a total dump. But we were all hot and tired and didn’t care anymore, so we blasted the AC and got some sleep.

The next day we woke up smelling like Robert Goulet’s asshole and packed up and headed out to our next spot, which was the Grand Canyon south rim. We took a shuttle from Tusayan. It was absolutely spectacular and everything I had hoped. None of us had been before, and we had a blast shuttling to various view points and watching storms slide by. 

We retired to our campground and had what was to be our nightly struggle keeping bugs out of the van (the bugs in this wooded area were out of control) and desperately reading the owner’s manual to figure out how the fuck to do even basic things in this van. We quickly discovered the toilet was useless for anything but pee, and even then stank horribly pretty much constantly, so we tried to use it as little as possible. The tiny shower was also basically useless, so we took to showering outside (once we figured out how to heat the water, which even then was lukewarm at best). 

The next day we headed to Slide Rock and, as I’d hoped, spent the entire day there. Everyone loved it, but the water was so freezing cold I couldn’t bring myself to get in above my waist. 

We then spent a pleasant evening in Sedona, and boy do I wish I’d included it more in my itinerary. Incredible red mountains with tons of trails - we had dinner with this view. I will definitely revisit this area when I have more time.

The next day we drove to another campground that didn’t allow reservations, and as it was by a river and only had a few spots, I was paranoid we’d not be able to get in. We went early and left out some chairs to claim a spot after paying for it, then headed to the Petrified Forest, which, if I’m honest, was not all that exciting. The boys got in the habit of saying, “oh, look, it’s another rock”. I enjoyed it myself, but it was definitely the least of the things we ended up doing. We returned to find our chairs gone. Sigh.

The next day we did our longest drive, up to Monument Valley nearly four hours away. I had wanted to hit up the Wupatki ruins and the Sunset crater, and we paid the entrance fee but ran out of time and had to leave before seeing anything but a short lava trail. We did, however, stop at a roadside dinosaur tracks area and paid a local Navajo woman for a tour, and it was pretty mind blowing.

We got to our Monument Valley campground as the sun was setting, and it was spectacular - by far the most beautiful campground I’ve ever been in. We slept in the back of the van with just some netting as a window, and got to enjoy this view:

I’m going to do a part II for Monument Valley since there are so many pictures.

Midsummer

After a very quiet and very boring week with no kids, I picked them up from camp today. It’s always funny to see how they return after being left to their own devices for a week. After teasing them about it relentlessly from last year, this year they did not return with one pair of dirty underwear and six pairs of clean underwear (!) - they actually used the laundry bags I sent - but they did return with very dirty hair and ankles and unused flossers. I guess a water pipe broke the first day of camp so showers were hard to come by. So they claim. 

I was talking to one of the counselors and apparently there were only about 48 kids there, less than half their pre-pandemic numbers. I see I’m not alone in this. I hope they don’t fold. The camps are all over the country, and the northern CA version runs for two weeks. I suppose I could look into that one if this one ceases to exist; or any other camp, really, but I like this one’s focus on science and critical thinking. 

But today I drove an hour and a half into the mountains, picked up the boys, took them to in-n-out, got us home, threw everything in the washing machine, went out to get groceries for our trip, made dinner for someone else for the first time in a week, got them showered, and now will soon go to bed. Tomorrow I’ll continue packing and food prepping, then Monday we leave on our week long campervan adventure across Arizona. Personally I can’t wait for the change of scenery. 

It’s only mid summer but I can feel it slipping through my fingers like sand. I tried to make the most of my week of freedom by seeing friends for lunch and not worrying about when I would get home…but truth be told it was mostly boring and lonely. I mostly worked, doing incredibly tedious work on spreadsheets and schedules, once for six hours at a stretch, and cursed how much I still have to labor over these things that I once thought would be completely automated by now. I hustled to get things out of the way before our trip, and mostly accomplished that. But when we get home I’m just one month out - the boys have two more weeks at their rec center camp, and then, school, and our lives change forever. Getting up early, getting supplies, learning new systems, figuring out afterschool, homework, early bed times. I’m not ready for all that again. Thankfully we have three more weeks before all that starts happening. I see moms posting in the local mom group about our old school and it stabs me in the heart a little bit. Soon they’ll be posting the class lists up on the office billboard and all the parents will stream up to take pictures and share with other parents…and for the first time, we won’t be any part of that, and we almost were. The school will go on without us. This thought is strangely unbearable to me. And so it goes. 

Today I tried to make a list of things to cut from next year’s event in an attempt at saving a little money. It’s frustrating how few areas can actually be trimmed, and how little money can actually be saved even by cutting budgets in every area - it’s just a couple thousand here, a few hundred there…barely worth it. But it does all add up. I think I could trim $20,000 next year, which doesn’t help much, but is better than doing nothing. And the good news is if the event suddenly starts looking better I can always add those things back in. But I don’t think next year will look better. I think next year will look worse, and will continue to until things around the world look better. We’re in for a long rebuilding period, I’m afraid, so I need to buckle up. Winter is coming. 

You say it’s your birthday

So entirely contrary to last year’s lying in bed alone and suffering with covid on my birthday, this year was a non-stop whirlwind of activity and socializing. 

My sister flew in for a visit on Wednesday, and we had a big pool party with mutual friends and Brazilian relatives on Saturday. Sunday we dropped the kids at their sleepaway camp, a ritual I missed last year for obvious reasons. How were they? I’m not going to say enthusiastic, but not bummed out, either; I think sort of more quiet and shy. They asked if I would send them mail - I didn’t realize this was a thing, being as they’re only there until Saturday - but I could tell how much they wanted this, so I hastily scribbled off two Bowie postcards and dropped them in the mail the next day. Hopefully they’ll get them before they leave!

Yesterday was my actual birthday, and I had decided the thing I wanted to do most was (shocker) drive out to the desert, so my sister, H and I got in the car yesterday morning and headed out in the terrible heat (109° at times!). I was worried about the extreme heat, but we were mostly in the air conditioned car. We stopped at an antique store in Yucca Valley and I cleaned up - I got a desert survival guide, some 1950s UFO club magazines, a knife rack for the cabin, and some 1930s goggles. Then we did a scenic drive through Joshua Tree National park, then out to the cabin. I can’t say the contractors did a great job at the end - I think they were very anxious to get the job finished and couldn’t deal with any niceties, so there’s some siding left around in the sand that we have to clean up, and lots of bags of construction garbage inside the place that we have to somehow dispose of, and the paint job was very slap-dash and messy, which will require some touch ups on our part. Also the security shutters they put on the bottom windows don’t have locks so they’re far from secure at the moment. They also left all the upstairs windows open - good thing we came along or the place would be full of sand by the fall. I also am very skeptical of the wood burning stove installation - it looks like a total fire hazard and a mess. There’s no way we’re lighting that thing up until I get a professional in to make sure it’s safe. Maybe if our neighbor returns I can ask him to check it over. For now, though, with the insulation, I’m sure any winter cold could be tempered by our little propane heater like last year. Co2 monitor on and windows cracked, of course. I sort of knew the last visit with those guys would be a bit of a mess - they’d been out there so many times, and this last one in extreme temperatures, so I honestly can’t blame them for just wanting the hell out of there. In the end we achieved the impossible which was a finished, livable cabin, and I’m over the moon. 

We had time to kill, so we drove up Amboy (pop 5) and then back to 29 Palms for a bougie dinner at Kitchen in the Desert, then a drive home. We got back about midnight, completely exhausted. I’m glad I have nothing to do today but take my sister to the airport later tonight; I’m wiped.

In other news, Stripe suddenly agreed to give me my money (after I finally supplied them with paperwork slapped together that they had been asking for), which is great…but this year isn’t the one I’m worried about, it’s next year. And they did say this is going to be an ongoing process in which they’ll continue to demand paperwork and withhold *up to* 100% of my money if they see fit. So I still have to look for solutions, which may involve only releasing my tickets in batches, which the customers will hate, but I may not have a choice. It just might be the only way to avoid red flags, and honestly I don’t even know if that will work. I don’t know what their threshold for withholding funds is - what if it’s not even based on income but instead on business model? So as much as I’m glad the current situation is resolved, it only opens up more questions about the future. 

I think that’s kind of the mood of the day, now that I’m 51. What does the future hold for me? What’s going to happen to the business that’s held me afloat for 25 years, in this increasingly hostile environment - will it survive? What’s going to happen to these kids at this new school this year? What’s going to happen to me and my body as I relentlessly age? I had some spotting yesterday and thought it was a period two weeks early, but it wasn’t. Perimenopause is upon me, and I don’t know what to expect, and it’s scary. I don’t know how to keep my body fit and healthy at my age, but I know I have to figure something out because I’m now the heaviest I’ve ever been, none of my clothes fit, etc etc. La lucha continua. So I go into this new decade full of trepidation. There could be a lot of change headed my way, and most of it…isn’t good. 

Moving on

After all the stress and depression of the last couple of weeks, I’m ready to shake it off like an itchy prom dress. I’ve told everyone who needs to know about my shitty numbers - including the H, who, naturally, was annoyed I hadn’t mentioned it. I realize I do hide things from him, mainly because I don’t like the way he reacts when I do tell him. So we had a tough discussion about how I don’t like whenever I share a complaint about how my business is going, he starts lecturing me about all the things I should be doing instead of trusting me to know what the fuck I’m doing. It’s a guy thing, that fix it mentality. It’s super annoying. But I realized taking the tactic of just hiding information from him doesn’t work, either, because when he finds out, he’s doubly agitated. I hide things a lot, from a lot of people (again, trauma response). Mostly I think it works in my favor, but this isn’t the first time he’s been angry that I withheld something from him, so I need to stop doing that. And instead be very clear as far as my expectations when I do tell him things - ie, you’re not allowed to give me advice, full stop. I don’t know if he’ll ever get this, but I need to stop avoiding conflict and just tackle this head on. 

Telling people - especially my life partner - about my bleak financial future, has been oddly freeing. Here we are, not where we thought we’d be, but we need to adjust accordingly. It’s already had the positive effect of getting the H to stop running the AC like the house is a meat packing factory. So, hooray for that. 

Today we *finally* got the bivalent shots for the boys, with resultant frozen yogurt. One messed up thing happened, though - the nurse said Theo was due for three other shots, and he said he’d be into it, and then I heard her say one of them was the HPV shot which I knew was for 11-year-olds, so when she returned with the shots I asked if maybe she was talking about the wrong kid, and she said yes, as she was getting the shots together she realized she misspoke. So then poor Bobby had to get four shots he wasn’t ready for. He handled it like a champ but did use it as leverage to use the VR first. I recounted the story of how I got all my first vaccines right after pushing his GIANT HEAD out of my body and I had just gone through so much pain that the shots didn’t even barely register. Bobby said he was glad he would never have to give birth. I said amen. 

Today I got Theo a kid’s watch just like B’s because I feel like their new school is a lot bigger and Bobby may not always know where Theo is when it comes time for pickups, etc. Having one kid completely out of touch is not such a great thing. We’ve also been talking about putting a better schedule together as far as monitoring their evening time after school - ie, cutting down screen time - and one tool I think I can use is to take one day a week to go to the library across the street from their school and have them pick out books to read. With library late fees no longer a thing in LA, and Theo never having taken to reading the way B did, I feel like this could be a good way to get more books into their lives (without me having to buy them). I always feel guilty about how much time these kids spend in front of screens, so I’m hoping this switch to a new school will be our impetus to make other changes as well.

I handed off my treasurer duties to the new person. I had written up a map of when/how to do things, and assured her I’d be available for any help or questions (and her kids are and will be at eagle rock jr/sr high so odds are she’ll be in my life in the future). Ah, what a weight off my shoulders. All I can say is, I did my best (but I guess my best wasn’t good enough). In the future I will be happy to volunteer and help out with school stuff, but I will never be treasurer again. You really need more accounting skills than a non-accountant to do stuff like that. 

We ended up having a surprisingly fun 4th - we just went to a local high school (who knew this was a thing - not people that grew up in nyc, that’s for sure) and honestly the fireworks show was pretty great and not overly loud like I was anticipating. I actually had fun on the 4th for the first time ever. 

The 4th

The household is sick, which is giving me covid era vibes. I kept the kids home from camp yesterday, and the H has for the first time since I’ve known him taken these two days off work due to illness, which means I’ve been cooking and cleaning non stop, and I kind of hate it. What’s going on with us? Not covid, as we’ve all tested multiple times for several days. Theo doesn’t seem sick at all, Bobby has a bad cough, I had what seemed to be mild congestion that’s clearing up now, and the H is a complete wreck. Who knows? 

We went to a small neighborhood fireworks show on Saturday, and may or may not venture out tonight. I heated up the pool yesterday so the kids would have something to do, and we may go back in today as well. It’s pretty loose today. As I’m sure I’ve mentioned many times, this is my least favorite holiday due to my sound issues, so I just sort of want to get past it. I had hoped we could escape to the desert for some quiet, but unfortunately it’s about 109° there. Now I know for future years that unless we get some kind of ac going, the desert is going to be a no-go for the 4th. When my sister comes next week I’d like to drive out for the day on my birthday, however, no matter how hot. We’d go at night for dinner and to briefly show her the place, retrieve the keys left by the contractor, and pick up any camping stuff we’ll need for our road trip at the end of the month. Honestly that sounds like a great birthday to me.

I’ve been in a bit of a dark place lately and am trying to climb out of it. I think the keyword here is acceptance. I’ve been very worried about money and how my event is going, to the point of not being able to think about anything else. And in the last couple of days I’ve gotten to the point of acceptance - that yes, unfortunately, things are not going to go the way I wanted this year. The writing is on the wall. I had hoped I would have the biggest year ever - that’s impossible. I then hoped I’d at least return to my pre-covid numbers - now that’s impossible, too. So, despite it being my 25th anniversary and the first year with no covid restrictions, this will be my smallest year since before I moved to Labor Day ten years ago. It’s infuriating and breaks my heart, but here we are. So any dreams I had of paying down the house or even putting aside money for savings, even a little bit, are dashed. I’ll be lucky to just break even and make it to Feb 1. I’ve had almost no one sign up since opening night, which is a first, and even though I know I’ll get some people in the next two months - maybe 100, 200 if I’m lucky?, that’s not enough for how much things cost these days. I’m currently sitting on about five refund requests, as well. But, I have to accept it. And I have to focus on putting on a great show for all the lovely people who did spend the money and make the effort to show up and feed my kids, and just keep walking forward. I stupidly thought there wouldn’t be any rebuilding to do after covid, but boy was I wrong. The fact is I may never get back to where I was in 2019, and I’m just going to have to adjust. Thankfully our desert place is all but done, and that will at least take the place of expensive vacations for the time being. There’s no big expenses looming, and I’m still on track to pay down the house by end of 2029. I’ve got a good deal at the hotel for two more years until the shit hits the fan. I’m not going anywhere and we will persevere. It does remind me a lot of surviving the big lawsuit at the beginning of the event and then once I was cleared and had the event to myself, having the worst year ever in 2001. I always likened it to being declared cancer-free and then getting hit by a bus. We’ve now survived two years of covid shut downs only to have an extremely lack luster return - last year’s numbers sucked, too - and this one big anniversary year I was counting on to help supplement the difficult years ahead didn’t even deliver. What a fucking drag. 

STILL, I’m going to try to move past the disappointment and look to the positive. I had a visually impaired person wanting to attend reach out to ask me to recruit some helpers/dance partners for her, and I put the word out, and was delighted by the number of people stepping up to help. It really restored my faith in humanity. My family is here and we’re safe and (will soon be) well, and I have things to look forward to. After two and a half years of frustration and failures, my desert place is all but done (they’re coming to paint end of week). I asked the H to get me a vintage bellows camera for my birthday so I can start tinkering around with old timey photography, something I used to love to do when I was younger and I’m excited to get back into. My friend who moved here from NY a couple of years ago has been inviting me to art house films, which is also getting me back into one of my favorite passions. Last night we saw the 1977 disaster classic “Rollercoaster” and we may go see The Untouchables in 70mm on Saturday. It’s good to get back to myself. 

Self improvement

I’ve been on a bit of a self-improvement kick, I’ve noticed. It wasn’t conscious, but I’ve realized now that’s what I’m up to.

I’ve been buying makeup - something I do maybe once every twenty years, ha ha. I’ve been using some pencil eyeshadows and really enjoying them to look more “made up” every day. At my last hair appointment I asked my hairdresser to bring my shade down a notch so it would match the hairpieces I use for 40s styles…but after a month realized the blah dishwater blonde was just hideous so went back Wednesday to brighten it up again - hair pieces be damned - and already feel better. It also dawned on me I don’t need to get a haircut every eight weeks - if I really want to grow it out, I can certainly skip a month here and there. Duh. Saves money, too. I’ve been in the process of buying summer skirts (none of which fit, hence the desire for weight loss) and Thursday embarked on a massive closet clean-out that took all day and resulted in giving away three large garbage bags. Just like my makeup, I hadn’t done a thorough clean out in probably 15-20 years; there were things in there I hadn’t touched or thought about since before Bobby was born. I got rid of things that were hopelessly too small, out of style (I’m looking at you, bias cut Jersey stripy skirts), not my style anymore (culturally appropriative Mexican dresses, baby doll dresses, low rise pants), or that I had just proven to myself I would never wear (high maintenance linen pants - I never see anyone so jeans and t shirts it is). I also sadly had to throw away several sweaters that had fallen prey to our endless infestation of moths. But I never wore them anyway, so meh. For how rarely I go into that closet, it’s shockingly satisfying just knowing that it’s clean and organized and only contains things I’ll actually wear. Also seeing how many things I had to give away that I bought on Etsy but then arrived not fitting me, I realized I need to seriously curb my Etsy buying and instead find local stores where I can vintage shop and try things on. I don’t want to buy new things except underwear and sleepwear and workout clothes - for me, everything else (jeans, dresses, blouses, skirts) should be bought used. To save my wallet and the planet. I loathe shopping but looking at the hundreds of dollars worth of stuff I just gave away never worn by me - yeah, this is incredibly wasteful. 

And - drum roll - I finally got off my ass to make a tattoo appointment with a swing dance friend of mine (female). It’s a consult to see if she can work with my idea of a sailor Jerry style heart on my arm. It may not be her style exactly - her work is very artistic and realistic - but I figure I have to start somewhere. I think a tattoo is something I’ve just overthought to death. I’ve wanted one for ages but then always shied away from actually doing it. Why? Would I ever actually regret it? I’ve spent my entire life in an “alternative” environment. I’m not, and never will be, in a culture that would penalize me for having tattoos. And it won’t even show most of the time. So why not? 

Towards the end of week one of dieting and have lost three pounds of traveling/water weight, which is always a great way to start. I only have four pounds to lose to get back to where I was at my last event, although obviously I’d love to do better than that. It’s going to be a rough go with 4th of July, my birthday, and our campervan trip all happening this month, but I figure if I can at least maintain or lose a pound or two by August, then it’ll be easier to really power through. One tool I recently bought - inspired by the opening episode of And Just Like That - are these English egg coddlers:

I tried them out today and it was a trial and error experience. But thankfully unlike boiling eggs in a shell, you can take the lid off of these and check the status and continue to cook if they’re not quite done. Next time I’ll be able to do it correctly the first time. Water to the very top (despite what the directions told me) and eight minutes. I made the H one with toast points and he loved it. Now I wish I’d gotten the “king size” version; these are so tiny. But for now a nice little boiled egg for breakfast in a cute container is right up my alley and diet friendly. 

Kids were supposed to get their bivalent vaccines for sleepaway camp today, but at the last minute Kaiser called to tell me they didn’t have any pediatric-trained administrators available and I’d have to call some other number to reschedule, and of course no one is at that number until Monday. Harrumph. The vaccine requirement came as an irritating surprise - the camp sent a letter a couple of weeks ago saying they decided everyone needed the bivalent vaccine (the only one my kids don’t have); not that they’ll be denied entry without it, but if even one kid doesn’t get it, everyone will have to wear masks for the entire camp. I think this is ridiculous, but of course I’m a rule follower so I’m trying to comply, but they’re not making it easy. I tried to save the day by scheduling the vaccine at a pharmacy elsewhere, but the bivalent vaccine for kids is almost non-existent now; I found a Walgreens that has them and scheduled them for today, but then when I called to ask if there’d be a cost, they said because I’m with Kaiser they can’t even give them to us at all even if we offer to pay. So we’re stuck just waiting on a call from Kaiser and I have only a week left before the cut off. I spent two hours this morning trying to sort this out. What a pain in the ass. And there’s nothing like emotionally preparing your scared kids all week about the shots happening today only to have them cancelled because the person scheduling us screwed up and put them in as adults. Great.