Monday, November 30, 2015

Thanksgiving weekend

Right now I'm sitting in an over-heated house watching a documentary about Gore Vidal and William F Buckley. Which is all I want to do after a loooooong holiday weekend. 

For the record, it was good. My sister and brother in law visited, The Boyfriend stayed with me the whole time, and we were very, very busy. 

I prepared a Thanksgiving meal for everyone plus a friend of The Boyfriend's, minus the turkey. He brought a pre-cooked turkey over which just needed to be heated up...unfortunately, he discovered I had none of the required equipment for turkey heating - no meat thermometer, no roasting pan, no baster, etc. I'm a vegetarian, what would I do with that stuff? So as with many Thanksgivings, it did not go off without a hitch. But it went off pretty well considering the delicate balance of juggling the kids, greeting visitors, and making sure mashed potatoes, stuffing, peas, risotto, corn bread, gravy, turkey, and green bean casserole all served hot at the same time was actually accomplished. Here's the table setting before:

...and the aftermath in the kitchen...

The next day we went to the Redondo Beach Pier, which was chilly and pleasantly not busy. 

The day after we went to the Griffith Observatory, which was insanely packed and the parking was a nightmare, but was a decent enough time once we got there. At the end of the day Bobby was acting out so much I felt like wringing his neck (but didn't). Considering the fact that Thanksgiving last year was the day I first hit him, I suppose this year was a step up. So...there's that.

That night I had a gig in San Diego at a jazz festival, which meant I left the house at 4 PM and didn't get back until after 3 AM. Thankfully The Boyfriend drove me; I never would have survived that long drive home had I been by myself. For how much it cost me to pay the babysitter, if we have this same gig next year I think I'll stay overnight. I was so exhausted I was hallucinating.

The next day on just a couple of hours' sleep we had a mellow walk around the silverlake reservoir and then had an early night. The relatives left, The Boyfriend went to work, and everything went back to normal.

I had lots of hug and talk sessions with Bobby before, during, and after the weekend about what was going to happen. I'm not sure if these helped keep the meltdowns somewhat at bay, but I like to think so. At the beginning of the weekend he was being weird so I asked if he was freaked out that a lot of people were coming over, and he said yes. I comforted him about this. At one point he referred to the living room as "the loudest room in the world" because of all the grown ups talking and laughing. He is for sure his mother's son. I get very overstimulated by lots of noise and commotion and chaos and kind of freak out. For sure my preference in these situations is hiding out in the kitchen. Towards the end of the weekend when he was acting out I asked if he was sad because everyone was leaving and he nodded yes and said he needed a hug. I tried really hard to hear him and acknowledge his feelings, and not expect him to be a perfect little angel while his whole life is turned upside down. This shit is highly confusing for kids. I get all freaked out and cranky - imagine how a three-year-old must feel? 

Thankfully Theo was chill and adorable all weekend. Babies are so frigging easy! I dread the day that goes away. 

Things went just fine with The Boyfriend. I figure if we can survive this, and Christmas, with him being a very active co-parent, we're in good shape. As with Bobby, I made an effort to thank him for everything he did for us all weekend and make sure he knew he was loved. In return he took really good care of me and lightened the burden a lot. 

But yeah, other people are a lot of work. Worth it, I am very much looking forward to spending a couple of nights blissfully alone watching documentaries and drinking strong cups of tea. Sometimes being alone can be pretty great, too.


  1. Wow, that last photo is amazing! Totally frame-worthy.

    So this Boyfriend guy is kind of a keeper, eh? Seems like you hit the jackpot!

    Awesome work with Bobby.

  2. Way to go with Bobby! Sounds like it all went very well. Though that kitchen reminds me why I don't entertain more, lol!!