Body things

So in the middle of tariff insanity and rollercoaster stock markets, I decided to get another tattoo with the rest of my rapidly diminishing money. It was a nine hour extravaganza on Monday with the same female artist who did my other tattoo. As last time, the planning and designing took about six hours, with a dinner break, and then an hour of outlining and an hour of color. I can say this - unlike last time, this time HURT LIKE FUCKING HELL. Like, unbearable, labor-like hell. Why? In looking at tattoo pain charts, there’s no reason this part of my arm should have been so much worse than the other part of my arm (like really, completely night and day). I was gripping the seat and clenching every part of my body and groaning in misery. I’m very tempted to make this the last tattoo. I know I wanted a New York one, but oh my god. If anything, I would not do both outlining and color in the same session. It’s just too much. I was shaking uncontrollably and then pretty much limp by the end of it. Nope. Not doing that again. 

So what we did was combine elements of the first tattoo - traditional style elements - to make it look like they were intentionally grouped together rather than done years apart with no planning. It’s a bit of a bold move for me, since the idea behind the first tattoo was to hide it under a short sleeve most of the time, whereas this one will be visible most of the time. In other words, it’s more of a commitment to outing myself as a somewhat alternative person. This was a conscious choice. I’ve decided I want to be the kind of woman who has visible tattoos. This is a big shift in my life-long unwillingness to visibly identify with any particular group so I can always blend in unnoticed. Perhaps it’s just so true that as you get older you stop caring about that stuff and just want to do what you want to do. “Why shouldn’t we decorate ourselves?”, my tattoo artist said on our first meeting. Why not, indeed?

So for the next few days I have to keep it under a tight Saran-wrap-type bandage, which unfortunately has been leaking for days, even after I continually expand its borders with extra pieces she gave me. I’m tempted to just rip the whole thing off now, but the last thing I need is an infection as I’m headed to Hawaii for a week (I’m already seriously questioning my judgment about doing it this close to this trip). So I’ll take it off Sunday night before we leave, which is already a day short. Can’t wait to be done with this healing part. Then I just have to keep a good barrier of approved lotion (which I kept from last time) and lots of sunscreen during the trip. Hopefully it’ll all turn out ok. 

In other news, yesterday, ten days into taking the terzepatide pills, I started to feel vaguely nauseated, and this has continued into today. So one would think if it was food poisoning or some kind of virus, I’d already be throwing up or be getting past it. Is it the pill finally kicking in, or just a coincidence? I’m still hungry at normal times, still thinking about food - which tells me it might just be a coincidence. But I’m not 100% sure how these GLP-1s work with regards to nausea and/or losing interest in food…does the nausea come first, then the food noise stops later, or does the food noise stop because you’re nauseated so nothing looks appealing? I kind of have felt like crap in general physically and emotionally the past couple of days, because a) my arm hurts, b) I’m PMSing and bloated and crampy, c) political stuff is getting me down and depressed, and d) I can’t exercise because of my arm. So any number of these things could be contributing to the general bad constitution I’m currently experiencing.

Tomorrow I go to a Bernie Sanders rally downtown, Sunday I go dancing and celebrate a 90 year birthday party, then Monday we leave for The Big Island. I think we were last there in 2017, 2018? The kids were so little then, they don’t even remember it. It’s going to be a very different experience going to Hawaii with a cell phone having teenager and his almost pubescent little brother. No car seats!