Tuesday, September 13, 2016


I believe this drawing by 4 1/2 year old Bobby sums up my attitude towards parenting right now:

I am still exhausted and fed up from the event, which is not helping, but oh man, is going back to being (nearly) full-time single mommy to two kids under five is fucking brutal. Once again I find myself gritting my teeth through each day with my endless mantra, ihatethisihatethisihatethis running through my head. 

Everything is a fight. Everything is a threat of punishment to get even the most basic things accomplished - putting shoes on, eating, peeing. I love that my kid (Bobby) is so irreverent and questioning of authority. But you know what I've discovered? Behind every awesome, kick-ass adult is an exhausted mother. There are memes going around Facebook of mothers praising their daughters' independence but wishing that independence wasn't asserting itself right now, in this supermarket. Right?

I don't know what the answer to this is. Does parenting ever get easier? More often these days I feel like it's gotten harder, not easier, as we shed the baby years and go full throttle into big kid stuff. And will only continue to get harder as they become less gullible and less easy to please. 

But five years into this game, I definitely still have the Stay at Home Mom Blues. I am considering having Theo at school five days a week instead of three, even if that will cost $300 more a month. I feel guilty even thinking about it. I may never make the call. But I am considering it. 


  1. Hang in there!! Elsie was hell for 2 years 2-4 years old. From what I gather you either get hell from 2-4 or 3-5 but it seems to universally last 2 years. In our case, a couple days after her 4th birthday some neuron must have grown in her brain because all of a sudden she became reasonable again. Does she have her moments? Yes but the tantrums do not last as long and they are more predictable and can be headed off more easily as a result.

    It will get better!!

  2. Thanks for the drawing. I have no useful advice to offer, but I'm sitting here laughing helplessly - so thanks for that. :)

  3. The drawing is funny! And, yep I am not a fan of 3-years old so far, and we are only halfway through :-( Some of the other Moms I talk to agree - 3yr is way harder than 2yr.