Tuesday, October 27, 2015

It's Complicated

Money means choices. And choices often means paralyzingly difficult decisions.

I am desperate to pull up my horrendously soiled hallway and bedroom carpet and replace it with hardwood (no hardwood underneath, unfortunately) and then paint and re-plaster my bedroom walls/ceiling in preparation for the boys to move in there so I can take the bedroom that butts up against the living room (Bobby's current room).

But...I don't feel Bobby and Theo can be safely left alone in a bedroom, not just yet. 

On the other hand, Theo is likely to be climbing out of his crib up in the attic any day now, if he is at all on Bobby's schedule for that sort of thing, which means his days in the attic are numbered. Bobby is also getting worse about being within hearing range of the living room (he was miserable when I hosted my last book club). And as mentioned I am desperate to pull up that awful carpet and get us all settled in our permanent sleeping situations - me in the middle, boys in the back where it's quieter. But. Are they safe to be left unsupervised...? I would set up the baby monitor so I can keep an eye on them, but I'm still unsure.

It's complicated. Right now I'm just taking bids. I may not be able to afford it anyway. And in case you're wondering, I kind of have to do hardwood. The idea of two young boys who often get nosebleeds, soak through their overnight diapers, and get horrible stomach bugs several times a year in a carpeted room fills me with terror. I'd much sooner wipe than scrub, thousands of dollars extra be damned.

In other news, everything is a-ok with me and The Boyfriend. After a short cooling-down period, we spent a lovely day alone at a beach in Malibu on Sunday, then took the kids to a restaurant for dinner. Bizarrely, sitting in the booth right next to us so that I couldn't avoid eye contact every time I looked at The Boyfriend across from me was none other than The Horrible Little Troll, the unfortunate guy I met my first time out back in June through POF who completely misrepresented himself. We didn't acknowledge each other. It made me extremely uncomfortable. Can you say awkward???

The Boyfriend and I have been fine ever since. That feeling of pressure and smothering I had before is entirely gone - maybe it does just get down to not spending quite so much time together, and establishing that this person is not, in fact, going to get all butt hurt if Iwant some time to myself. I do believe I experienced The Three Month Freak Out in which I was ready to throw in the towel. This is typically the point at which most of my previous relationships ended (well, let's be honest...it's usually at the six week mark). We survived, and are doing better than ever. So, yay us!


  1. Glad everything is OK. Time alone to recharge is so important!
    (And how great that Bobby is wearing a shirt that says "Full Speed Ahead" as he dons his helmet!)

  2. Did you look at faux wood floor? Aka laminate? There's some really nice, realistic stuff out there. Way better than horrible carpet!

    I don't think you should assume that Theo will climb out as early as Bobby did.

    And yes, baby monitors.

    Also, invest in a really good sound machine. Or two, one for each boy. They are SOOOO worth it! Marpac is the brand everyone recommended to me. Love. Them. They travel with us!

    I really agonized about when to put my girls together and pulled the plug only because Calliope begged. But it's MOSTLY really great. It does force me to hop out of bed more quickly than I would otherwise if one is up at night. But they sleep through more than I would have guessed. And now Calliope can just climb into bed with me, which is fine if not ideal.