Sunday, December 22, 2013

Christmas week

I have had a hum-dinger of a weekend, and it ain't over yet. Months ago I loaded up this weekend with the understanding that Christmas week was going to be devoid of all activity/socialization, so I wanted to be utterly exhausted by the time Christmas actually arrived. I believe I have accomplished that goal.

Because of back-to-back singing gigs Fri & Sat nights, I have been surviving on about 4 hours' sleep the last two days, which has been brutal. This is one of the areas where single parenthood takes its toll - no option for rest when you especially need it. I considered using the Baby Kennel yesterday, ditching out on the bridal shower and Christmas party I had committed to, and instead just heading home to sleep. But I really didn't want to let people down and not fulfill my obligations (I'm a bit psychotic about that), AND I knew I probably wouldn't get any sleep anyway but just toss and turn in bed in the middle of the day, watching the clock tick down until it was time to pick B up. So. Day two of no sleep, and I still have to get dressed up and go out tonight and be "on". The irony is, had I nothing to do this weekend I would be all sad and lonely and depressed and resentful I was stuck at home while everyone else was out having fun. Did I mention I'm just impossible to please right now???

Had an awful moment Friday night wherein I checked in for a second time with my 3rd call babysitter for Saturday night, having not heard from her...only to have her apologize that she got called out of town on a family emergency. Great. And who, exactly, would be free the Saturday night before Christmas at a moment's notice? So I spent all night stressing about it, and imaging I would just have to not show up for our much-anticipated and advertised gig - something I'm grateful I haven't had to do yet. But thank GOD the sitter found someone for me who was free; and I had no choice but to trust a complete stranger with my house and child for a night while paying her every penny I made. Still, it all worked out. Definitely reminded me that I MUST start expanding my pool of babysitters. And not just people who can help out in a pinch...but are then never available when you need them. I mean real professional baby sitters who want the work and (hopefully) don't charge $20/hr. I'm not sure how I'm going to do this but I have a few resources. Thankfully for obvious reasons I won't be out much for the next six months - we have only a couple of gigs in Jan-March; the March one I may not even be able to do (experience shows me it's almost impossible to sing in your third trimester; you just have no lung capacity at all). If I need to go out in evenings this spring I figure many things I can take Theo to as I did Bumpus when he was that small, so maybe I can avoid the "two kid" rate for a while! I'm pleased the Baby Kennel offers a discount for siblings so I'd only pay $15/hr for both kids to be watched if I need a little time to myself on the weekend. So, I can still have my little getaways. 

B has not napped today despite my driving around for nearly two hours and expending a quarter tank of gas. I really don't know how to fix our nap situation. I haven't even tried to get him to nap at home - how can I? When he was stuck in the pack 'n play I could just plop him in there, pull down the shades and walk out and he would fuss a little but then sleep; now with a toddler bed and his own room he would just get up and run to the closed door and scream (in case you haven't noticed, I gave up on Operation Bumpus Plays Alone in His Room some time ago). So instead we just drive somewhere; 90% of the time he sleeps. His having or not having a nap doesn't seem to affect anyone except me - but I just wish I could get him to nap in his room! Any advice on this subject would be appreciated.


  1. I really wish I lived closer to other choice moms like you. When your sitter cancelled I would have said "bring him over here!" Or so you could get a few hours of sleep. It would be so wonderful to have one or two other SMCs where we just helped each other. My married friends all get regular breaks and even though I am in a babysitting coop and have great friends to lean on, it is not the same. Glad you got it all figured out. No advice on the napping, I have always been very strict about sleeping in their own beds and my girls are agreeable enough that the generally follow the rules. At 4 yo, Fiona is outgrowing her naps and man, it does HURT to not have that afternoon down time.

  2. I was thinking the same thing as Claire. I spend Saturday nights home doing laundry & really don't mind so would've been happy to have B!

    Elena started phasing out her nap around 18 was hit & miss...I did the driving around thing too. Sorry no real advice.

  3. Mine is still in a crib, even though she is almost 2.5 years old...and sometimes I just let her cry it out in there and make it clear that she is going to rest for a while, even if she doesn't go to sleep. I wonder if you were able to make it clear that he can't get out of his room during nap time and turned the lights off, etc. he would at least get some rest and sometimes nap? My experience is that my daughter sometimes takes up to an hour to fall asleep on the weekends!

    Sorry you are having to go through this.

    good luck!

  4. Can you do the same routine you do at night during the day for naptime? That's what I do. A shortened version of the same routine, and she knows it means it's time to sleep. I also did Ferber a while back, as you may remember, and I think that helped. She's still in a crib, though, so who knows what'll happen when I eventually try to transition her to a bed... Good luck!