Wednesday, August 7, 2013

Nine weeks

In case any of you were worried, everything's cool. I think this is probably the longest I've gone without blogging. Honestly I'm just too tired and distracted. Every night has to be spent answering endless questions about my event via email or Facebook (all of which could easily be answered if these people would just go to my website), returning phone calls from people in their eighties and nineties who don't have computers but want information, but then can't write anything down because they can't hear me because their hearing aid is off and they can't find their glasses. For this brief time of year my life becomes completely overtaken by my two least favorite words - Customer Service. And in the middle of juggling all that I have to try to find a new insurance provider for my event since last year's dropped me because I "don't give them enough business", try to hire a yoga teacher to teach each day before my dance classes, try to find a non-dancing babysitter to sit with B in the hotel room each night while he sleeps since the girl who originally agreed to do it has now decided she "kind of wants to go to all the evening dances", edit a formal video for my Hall of Fame presentation which involves combing through sixteen years of video footage for clips of various people dancing, try to find free or cheap devices to use new credit card processing sliders on that I then have to drive over to the hotel and check to make sure they work in the bowels of the basement ballrooms, write descriptions for sixty classes, figure out where to squeeze five performances during the dances, learn new songs to sing opening night, make costumes for four themed evenings, make endless descriptions and signs and handouts that everyone ignores and doesn't read anyway, keep on the graphic designer who promised me a "save the date" card for next year's event that now is so far behind I may not have them in time, arrange various djs for the event even though nobody wants to do the late night shifts, try to figure out how to let seven teams use the main ballroom floor for practice before 9 AM on Saturday, remind every single vendor and instructor that we're starting Friday night this year unlike Thursday night as for the past ten years, make up goodie bags with personalized schedules for about thirty people, make up personalized packages for about 150 competitors, do a giant Costco run for food for the event...and about a thousand other things. That doesn't even scratch the surface.

In the meantime B has developed the super annoying habit of pushing his diaper down as far as possible under his pants and then peeing all over everything. I have done nothing but clean up pee off of toys, carpets, and playpens for days, not to mention completely stripping his bed and washing it every single day because he wakes up completely soaked. I tried the one pair of overalls I have for him but he managed to slide his hands down the sides anyway. I tried the one onesie that still fits, with pants over it, but today he managed to pull off the pants and then reach into the leg holes of the onesie, pull out his poop, and smear it all over everything. I am absolutely at my wit's end. 

So, I am not having a good time right now. I have just three weeks to my event and the stress is overwhelming. It makes me do things like I did tonight, which was chuck everything and lie on the couch in a stupor. I was also exceptionally nauseated which is no help. And tomorrow I will once again be dragged out of bed by my piss-soaked boy at 6 AM to answer phone calls from people who can't use the internet and emails from people who want their money back because they're "running a little late on rent this month". Lord help me.


  1. Luckily, this rough patch does have an end date, push through for a few more weeks and then it is smooth sailing! I have no advice on the diaper thing....I remember that phase from when I was working at a daycare and I'm just hoping we skip it at my house! Maybe package tape his pants to his shirt?

  2. You can do this. You will get through this. And then it will be over!

    Good luck. Hang in there.

  3. Oh how I don't envy your pee/poo situation...that would drive me insane!!! The few times I've let E run around without a diaper, she has peed on the carpet, not on the copious amounts of hardwood or tile flooring where it would be easy to clean up!! I rubbed her nose in the carpet to teach her a lesson...that's a joke. Every time I tell that joke people stare at me aghast like I'd actially rub my kid's nose in the carpet!! Anyway, hope the next 3 weeks just fly by & you can relax after your event...

  4. oh god I can only imagine how stressed you are right now. Is there anyway you could get a couple of young girls off craigslist to help you for an hourly rate? Could you put leggings over his diaper and then a tight onesie? I'm sure it's just a stage but you so don't need this RIGHT NOW. thinking of you, hang in there Lindy Girl - you've got this! :)

  5. Wow, that sounds very stressful indeed! All that stuff surrounding your event, and then B's toileting habits; yikes! I don't blame you one bit for wanting to lay on the couch and take a breather for awhile. It's ok to check out for a bit. It's necessary to maintain sanity. (I'm doing the same right now; I have work/family/personal issues galore as usual, but tonight, I'm writing this from bed with my cat curled up by my side. Occasionally, I'm pausing, rubbing my belly telling my potential bean/beans to settle in for a good long winter's nap. Morning will come soon enough, and I'd like to have some resemblance of sanity when it does).

    I don't have a ton of advice on the diaper thing. I can't remember M doing this, but is this perhaps B's way of communicating he's ready for the potty? I know that's something you might not be able to explore with everything else that's going on, but maybe after your event when things are quieter and you're feeling better?

    Hang in there hon. I hope everything flies by quickly. You can do it.

  6. If it's not too hot, put him in a zip-up outfit with legs and put it on backwards so he can't undo it. And let him play with fingerprint or clay to meet his needs to smear and paint. It's a normal stage and I recently looked into it on behalf of my cousin. Also hoping we skip that stage...

  7. Yuck! Hang in there. Once it's over you can recoup.

    I hate the questions that people can answers for themselves, but now you have to spend precious time answering them (rather than telling them where the find the answer and coming across as a bitch). I get that a lot with my online classes.

    The suggestion about the zipper outfits is a good one if you have anything light enough. That is pretty gross and, I can imagine, super frustrating. I wonder if those one piece short outfits would work (although he would probably be able to go up the leg)...

    Good luck and hang in there. I had a day here too (crabby kid that slept crappy and then wanted to whine and cry most of the day and double tantrums at bedtime). Here is hoping that our tomorrows are better (and productive).