Monday, May 13, 2013

Beach Day

I started this day fantasizing about screaming "shut the F up!!!" at my crying child. I said fantasizing, not actually doing. Now I'm kind of horrified that I even thought that. I blame my (at the time) sleep-deprived brain. But my morning routine, after working for a while, is now no longer working. So once again I'm going to have to mix it up. What happens is I put B in the playpen when he wakes up at 6 AM so I can (try to) sleep a little longer. This worked famously when we were still nursing. Now...not so much. We haven't nursed in way over a week and he's gotten increasingly fussy about the morning playpen visit until today he was just hysterical. And I was so, so tired. Normally we have a nice leisurely breakfast when I finally drag my still exhausted carcass out of bed. But I think I'm going to have to do breakfast at 6. Snacks don't cut it; I think he's hungry for real food. Once he's eaten he's happy in the playpen for ages. So I will try it tomorrow, making breakfast at 6 and then trying to go back to bed. It's going to suck. But I absolutely, positively cannot start my day at 6 AM. Not when 5-10 times a month my days end at midnight or later. No sir. So if I can fool myself into thinking I'm getting a morning nap, then, there you go. 

I had already determined with today's projected triple digit temperatures that we were having a beach day. And so we did, and it was a lot less stressful than I had anticipated. The last time we went to the beach he was barely mobile at six months; this time I had visions of him crawling into the sea while simultaneously shoving sand and cigarette butts into his mouth and repeatedly ripping his hat off his head and getting third degree burns on his pasty skin. Only a couple of those things happened. He did eat a certain amount of sand (no cigarette butts, thank goodness), and ripped his hat off a lot, but he also kept it on a lot, too, and thankfully stayed in the shade with me most of the time. I thought to pick up a cheap plastic bucket play set on the way, and boy am I glad I did! Hours of entertainment. It would have been very different had I not brought anything for him to do. Never underestimate the power of toys for children!

So now on to what I don't want to talk about - yesterday. I did have a nice meeting with the "thinker" SMC. But that was my only plan for the day, and with it being blistering hot again, the playroom and our walk were out. And it was too late to go to the beach by the time my meeting was over, so I really had nothing to do but sit around and avoid Facebook like the plague. I don't know why this year was suddenly so hard on me - I mean, everything's fine, I have a baby, my mother and I do have a cordial relationship (she even sent me an e-card), so what the hell is my problem? I don't know. I just felt out of sorts. It's my own fault for not making plans. I hate, hate, hate not having plans on the weekend. It makes me feel like a big loser. But honestly I don't know how I could do it differently in the future. It's just a day everyone's busy with their families, and unlike Christmas or Thanksgiving it's not the kind of holiday non-relatives are welcome to join in. So it's kind of destined to be a lonely day for me, I think. Boo.


  1. I have to feed Felix within 30 seconds of waking up, or he's a hysterical mess. If I'm in a rush, I give him milk in a cup, Cheerios and half a banana. He will sit in his high chair for 30 - 45 minutes eating. I keep him where I can see him, just in case he chokes.

  2. Mother's Day won't always be boring. Eventually, B is going to be big/old enough to celebrate with and for you. And maybe eventually you'll find some other SMCs with kids and you guys can go to brunch or whatever to celebrate together. Just a thought.

    I absolutely, positively can not start my day at 6am either. Especially because almost all of my work days (3/week) end at midnight, and I don't get to sleep until around 1. But you know what? Usually I don't have a choice. :( Jordyn's been waking up around 6am for a while now, and doesn't tolerate the pack n play. It's also downstairs, so while I could try bringing it up to my bedroom, I don't think she'd last 5 minutes in it. I try to make up sleep on the nights I don't work, though, and do the best I can the rest of the time.

  3. My days have been starting around 6 a.m. too. I can usually get them to stay in their cribs with their mobiles for 15-20 more minutes while I try to get myself into a state where I won't say something similar to what you fantasized about and then I have to get up and get those bottles ready or all hell will break loose. And I usually don't get to sleep until 2-3 a.m. (one of them is often up in his or her crib around that time too). Thank goodness the babies (and me too!) take an hour to two hours naps after being up for around two hours. And sometimes I sleep during their second nap too. It's not easy and I didn't think I could do it. But somehow I am. You never could have convinced me that I would be able to.

    Sorry that the old routine is going to hell without the nursing. Maybe you could have breakfast as prepped as possible so it's easy to get ready. Then you just be a zombie until nap time (that's my routine - and sometimes it's a grumpy zombie even). Good luck!

  4. I have contemplated telling Elena to shut the eff up...I'm not proud of it & feeling horrible after the thought passes my brain...but sometimes, oy! Why won't she shut the eff up? It's like that story book making the rounds, Go the F*ck to Sleep!

    It's funny you say non-relatives aren't welcome at these holidays because we always seem to have non-relatives invited. Even this past mother's day, a friend of the family whose kids live out west came with us for our you're more than welcome to join Elena & I for any holiday!! Which gives me a thought...once B gets older, you could always plan some travel during times like these...

    1. Yes! I am definitely contemplating joining you on one of your fabulous beach vacations, once I know what my future holds!

  5. saw your tiny little patch of shade on the sand... check out the Sport Brella. Best. Thing. Ever. I'm obsessed with mine. Tons and tons of shade with plenty of space at the back to play in sand -- just pull the blanket forward to leave some well shaded sand for playing.